My Experience at Sacred Heart Monastery

A while ago, the Annual Conference organized a Continuing Education retreat at Sacred Heart Monastery in Cullman, Alabama, focusing on clergy health. As soon as I heard about it, I knew I needed to go.

I had previously experienced a meaningful season of prayer during a Walk to Emmaus, where prayer was central to the journey—but I had never been on an actual prayer retreat. Not really.

If I’m honest, I’ve always considered myself something of a novice when it comes to prayer. Early in ministry, I envied those who could offer beautiful, eloquent prayers on the spot. Given my calling—where I am frequently asked to pray (some might say it’s part of the job!)—that felt like a real deficiency.

But my uncertainty about prayer ran deeper than public prayers.

During my time in seminary, Bishop Carder—who later ordained me as an Elder in the Mississippi Annual Conference—wrote a book called A Bishop’s Reflections. I no longer have my copy, but one chapter warned against “trivializing” prayer. That stayed with me.

Was it trivial to pray for a parking spot at Walmart?

Should I only pray about serious things?

Does prayer change God’s mind?

How bold should I be?

What am I even supposed to say?

Those questions created a quiet crisis of faith—one I suspect many of us share at some point.

But crises of faith often become places where faith grows.

One of the most profound moments of my life came in a season when I simply could not find words to pray. I would start, stop, start again, and stop again—until finally I said, “Lord, I don’t even know how to pray.”

And in that moment, I sensed a response:

“My disciples didn’t either. They asked me to teach them how to pray (Luke 11), and I did.”

Since then, when I don’t have words, I return to the Lord’s Prayer—or as I often call it, the Model Prayer.

Over time, I’ve come to understand that prayer is more than words. It includes posture (submitting to God), presence (being attentive to God), and purpose (seeking the face of God).

I’ve learned something of meditative prayer. Years ago I read that Pope John Paul II began each day on his face at 5 a.m., praying for an hour before anything else. At the time I could not imagine what anyone would pray about for an hour. Now I find myself wishing I had an uninterrupted hour to continue praying.

I’ve also come to love the prayers of the Church—the prayers of the saints who have gone before us. I now regularly pray the Daily Office from the Book of Common Prayer, a practice that connects me not only to the wider Church, but also to John Wesley, whose vision of following Christ continues to shape me.

And yet—even with all of that—I had never set aside an entire day, much less several days, simply for prayer.

So when Bishop Lewis encouraged clergy in the Mississippi Annual Conference to take the final Sunday of the conference year off, I knew exactly what I wanted to do.

I didn’t wait for the scheduled Office of Spiritual Formation retreat in November. I went ahead and booked a “New Thing” weekend at Sacred Heart Monastery.

I know—it may seem unusual for a Methodist pastor to go on a Catholic retreat. Even my wife, Lorie, wasn’t entirely sure what to make of my desire to go.

But after everything of the past few years—COVID, a new appointment, disaffiliation conversations, and decisions beyond my control—I knew I needed something deeper. I needed to strengthen my prayer life.

I needed to get prayed up.

So I went.

Sacred Heart Monastery Grounds

And if I’m honest—it didn’t feel holy at first.

For the first day and a half I never seemed to sit where the Sisters wanted me to sit, never stood when I was supposed to stand, sang when I wasn’t supposed to sing, and forgot basic practices like bowing or genuflecting when entering the sanctuary. I started to wonder if I had made a mistake.

But those four short days would prove me wrong.

The retreat offered a number of gifts and lessons—the most important of which I’ll share another post.

Photo: Sacred Heart Monastery, Cullman, Alabama